That Kid’s Got A Mouth Like A Long Haul Trucker

I don’t have a picture of him in his long haul truck, so this will have to do

Tater says “bad” words. No really, it’s getting pretty bad, and it’s sometimes embarrassing when we’re out and about and he says ’em. Sometimes he says these ‘bad’ words on purpose, and other times by accident. And of course I have no idea of where he would pick up on these words since I never, ever use foul language.

Okay, that’s funny because my nose just grew about 12 inches!! I’ve got a mouth like a trucker, too. When Tater started talking, I even tried to stop cussing altogether. To those of you who regularly cuss: have you ever tried to stop? It.Is.Not.Easy. And I was unsuccessful in doing so. I cut down on the big, bad words (like the “f” word and the “s” word), but damn and hell are still fair game. I couldn’t stop cussing – pathetic, huh?! Try it sometime if you don’t believe me…it’s harder than you might thing.

Back to the kid…the bad words he says on purpose are the “s” word, damn, and hell (you’re surprised, right?). And because he knows he shouldn’t say them, he says them with emphasis. And every time, I tell him he cannot say those words and that that kind of language is unacceptable. Threats of soap in the mouth are handed down. I actually feel kind of bad punishing him since I know he hears Daddy, me, and almost everybody else he knows saying those words. But then I remember the whole do as I say, not as I do thing…

Bad words he says by accident include the “f” word and the word “cock”. The “f” word is how he says the word “fork”. So when he says “I need a fork”, well…I’m sure you can hear it in your head. It’s actually kind of funny! And for the word “cork”, he says “cock”. Why does a two-year old even know what a cork is? Maybe I drink too much wine…

Tater also says a slew of other things that I think are inappropriate for a two year old to say. The word “fart”…we say “toot” but daddy says “fart” and I guess that sounds funnier because he laughs every time he, or daddy, says it. His daddy has taught him to refer to his private stuff as his “junk”. I also don’t like when he says “butt”, and tell him to say “buns”.

I know that he’ll outgrow it and that I just need to continue to stop him from saying the words, especially in front of others…especially “I need a fork”! For the most part, I try to ignore it, but sometimes he says it and it’s funny and catches me off guard and I laugh (or giggle). We are working on it, and I’m a work in progress and continue to struggle with saying bad words. Maybe I need soap in my mouth.

If there are any truckers out there reading this, my apologies for using the stereotype.

And so it goes…


  1. haha that's pretty funny! It's amazing what kids pick up at such a young age!

    Happy TUESDAY!! (Friday WILL come. Eventually. )
  2. this made me laugh out loud :)
  3. I get the giggles too which is why I could never be in education ... I say point that 12 inch nose at your husband and blame him, especially when f bombs go flying around your in laws at the holiday table when your sweet little girls start broadening their vocabularies.
  4. That's hilarious and sounds exactly like my house. Only here it's times 3 lol. I have a mouth like a trucker too, and have tried to stop but it's near impossible. It's also impossible not to laugh when they do it too. :)
  5. Anonymous says:
    People who cuss like that don't have the intelligence to use better vocabulary.... Please don't pass that trait on to your children.
  6. I find it interesting that Ms. or Mr. Morality aka Anonymous doesn’t have the balls to post their name when questioning the intelligence of what I found to be a quite humorous blog entry. Offensive language is subjective. I don’t think anyone is saying “pass the fucking peas please” is ideal, but it is milk come out your nose funny when it happens. I’d much rather my children grow up in a real household where swearing occurs because it does in the big wide world. Ask, Joe Biden. You teach your children limits and that is what the author is doing and I am confident they will become contributing members of society and they won’t be released into the great big world with a stick so far up their ass that they might even know what fuck (fork) to use if they are ever invited (or crash) a state dinner.
  7. So funny! I'm sure we're gonna have the same thing going on in our house when Jack starts talking! I can just imagine my mom sitting there are he busts out with "I need a 'fork'"! Classic!
  8. Funky Mama Bird says:
    I feel like I'm probably reading about my future. I have horendous sailor mouth, and while the kid is mimicing that yet, he has picked up my habit of saying, "OK" before he does anything. So I figure it's just a matter of time. *sigh*
  9. bbcd mama says:
    It's hard to hold back laughter when they are trying to say a proper word that is close to a swear word, and the swear word comes out.
  10. Christine says:
    It's SO hard to stop swearing! Rosemary is six months and I really, really need to stop.

    I'm not sure if you read on my blog how I'm giving up new things throughout the year, well, swearing is next! I don't know if I can do it, but I'm sure going to try!

    Good luck!
  11. Your post just cracked me up! I am always telling my husband to stop cussing around our kids and it doesn't work! I am sure it will get better!
  12. I don't swear but kids end up hearing stuff from T.V. or others. My kids have all said some swear words at different times but thankfully it was very short lived.....then again my three year old thinks that shut up is a very naughty word so she uses it all of the time. I would hate for her to hear the F word because she would used it to death! ;)
  13. So hilarious! I can laugh at it now but when my youngest did this at the same age (2), I didn't think it was funny most of the time. But there are times were you have to turn away and laugh after you discipline them. She stayed home with my husband who likes to watch Scarface, The Godfather and every war movie you can imagine and the majority of these scripts have only one syllable words. Thank goodness she grew out of it and so will he. :)
  14. Cuz I'm the mamma! says:
    My hubby has a "potty" mouth and I've been telling him that our girls will soon be catching on. I agree - it's very hard to stop - cold turkey!! Oh - and I like your new blog design!! :-)
  15. MommyNeedsCake says:
    Is it bad that I WAS a teacher and still had a hard time? (For the record, NEVER E-V-E-R at school) My husband works in professional sports (ie. professional swearing) so he has a harder time getting in check at home. Like the day I came home and he confessed that if my 18 month old daughter said the "f" word, it was his fault and he was really, really sorry. Yeah, like that was going to help me in line at the grocery store. :-/
  16. Kimberly says:
    My son when he was 3 when he would see a fire truck he would say fire f*** I never thought to much about it until one day standing in line at the grocery store with this elderly women in back of me. Well needless to say he seen a fire truck and starts yelling mommy fire f***, fire f***. I could her the women behind me gasp, I turned around and told her he is trying to say truck. She just smiled. When I was done in line and getting ready to leave I over heard her tell the cashier did you hear that little boy, the cashier said "yes wasnt that funny" the women did not think so and told the cashier what is wrong with your generation.
  17. THE ONLY Mrs. Daniel Strain says:
    we have a similar problem with our four year old.. I cuss like a pissed off sailor and have also tried to stop but cant.. we have someREALLY annoying drug addict neighbor and one day i told my hubby i wish they would F**K off and she heard me and then she was playing out side and they were being loud and she YELLS. HEY NEIGHBORS F**K OFF!! i almost died.. of laughter.. it was SO NOT FUNNY!! but it was.
  18. WTH am I Doing? says:
    Wow. I'm really late to this one. Tonya has it up as one of her favorites & I clicked over, apparently to resurrect a post. :)

    Before Boo was born, and for the 1st year or so of his life, I had a mouth like a truck-driving former sailor. I made a conscious effort to minimize my swearing once I realized that Boo would get in trouble from people who were offended by swearing. Which is not fair to him since he is too young to know what he's doing.

    Nonetheless, the boy commuted with me until he was 4 1/2. A person can only be expected to have so much will-power.

    Overall, in nearly 5 years, I've only heard a couple of GDs out of him, a correction that "No, mommy, not *fucking* car, BLUE car," and one amusing dog story.

    We have a dog that poops in the house "occasionally." In my effort to curb my language, many things that frustrate me are "stupid" instead of "F*ing" or "GD." This means that my son uses stupid a. lot. *Sigh* Almost without fail, when one of the animals commits an "indiscretion," we always say "Stupid cat/dog!"

    So, when Boo & I venture upstairs to discover that our delightful chihuahua has left us another squishy gift, I sigh & open my mouth to mumble the usual "stupid dog..." but my son beats me to it. With clear irritation, Boo grumbles "fucking dog..."


    He caught me so by surprise that I had to work really hard to stifle giggles. I explained to him that he used a "mommy & daddy word" & he wasn't old enough to use that word yet. I don't tell him it's a bad word, because then there's the whole hypocrisy thing that's even harder to explain.

    Heh. So you're so not alone. ;o)
  19. WTH am I Doing? says:
    Oh, and for a long time? Boo really liked clocks. He would talk about clocks all the time. But he could not pronounce the "L." Heh. I have this on video. Muahahaha :D


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