I am excited to have one of my favorite tweeters and readers sharing a Monster Mommy Moment with us…Kirsten from The Kir Corner!
Kirsten is honest, funny, down to earth, a wife and mom to twin boys. I think we were automatic friends because she understands my pain! I love her sense of humor, her genuineness, and if (when) we meet IRL, I know we will hit it off immediately.
So please help me welcome Kirsten so she can share her Monster Mommy Moment with us.
If you’re not sure what a Monster Mommy Moment is, you can read all about how my weekly feature came to be here.
Go grab a cup of coffee and a donut, ahem, I mean a low-fat muffin, or depending on the time of the day maybe some wine and chocolate, and sit back and enjoy the story!
Ever since Natalie started doing Monster Mommy Moments, I’ve been quietly cataloging a list of them in my life.
The list is LONG my friends.
The times I’ve neglected, yelled too quickly or often, lost my temper and spanked (Yep I do it) or choosing my Evo Shift over them. All of these objectionable actions leave me guilt ridden and sad because I waited a long time, pushed through the hell that is infertility and In Vitro to bring home the sons that would complete my family.
You would think that I would be more grateful or patient or selfless, it turns out that even all that couldn’t save me from Monster Mommy Moments.
Six months after I went on bed rest and three months after my sons were born, I put a skirt and heels back on and walked back into the workforce. Sure some of it was financial, “me working” was a “smart decision” for our family financially but I bigger part of it was that I wasn’t cut from a cloth that espoused a stay at home status. I liked being needed, I liked working, and I knew my limitations with myself.
I commute and work with my husband, this gave me more time with him every day, and daycare was giving my sons, every single day, everything they needed to become social, to develop and thrive. Sure, I missed them, but I found such joy in picking them up each day, walking in to new milestones being hit alongside gummy smiles.
A true and perfect compromise for all of us, right?
So they grew, went from babies, to toddlers, to now, wow, preschoolers.
3 year old twins
They fight our authority and make their own conditions, which change from one moment to the next.
Which, finally, gets to my Monster Mommy Moment, that happens, *ahem* every day.
I think I’ve established that I spend a lot of time out of the house.
(I wake at 4:30am, we ALL leave the house before 6:30am, John and I work, we pick up our sons around 5pm and we go home.)
I love having dinner with my sons, even when it’s a game or pushing and pulling, cajoling and bribery. Which honestly, it so often is
So at about 7pm every night, I make an announcement that I am “going upstairs” and I do.
I take an hour while I leave my husband downstairs with my sons and I ignore everything.
I put our clothes out for the next day, I straighten rooms, I check my email, just one more time, I might “tweet”, but many times I just, um, “HIDE”.
I turn on the TV, I wash my face, change my clothes into my PJs, I wash my face and brush my teeth, I might pick up Entertainment Weekly or In Style and get lost in an article, movie or book review. I might peruse my DVR queue and spend some time with “The Glades”, “Covert Affairs” or “Drop Dead Diva” but I don’t call for those boys until I’ve settled in myself.
Not very “motherly” at all
I mean I spend more than 11 hours away from them daily and then I want Just.One.More?
Yet, here’s what I know: I love my boys more every single of the day, I believe that knowing my limitations and taking those moments for me give much more back to them as people, it cuts down on the OTHER Monster Moments of yelling and lost patience, it teaches me to look forward to the sounds of little feet pounding up the steps, yelling “Mommy” to me.
A sound I’ve waited my whole life to hear.
Thank you Natalie, for letting me share my Monster Mommy Moment with all your wonderful readers. It’s always fun to be in your space, I feel so honored to be here. Xo Kir
Kirsten, thank you for sharing your Monster Mommy Moment with us…and for reminding us all that taking time for ourselves is not only natural, it’s necessary…and I think most moms would agree it is required for us to keep our sanity! I couldn’t even imagine working outside of the home, being a mom, AND trying to make time for myself. Kudos to your husband for giving it to you.
Now go swing by The Kir Corner and say hello to Kirsten, and if you’re new there make sure to tell her that I sent you. I know you’ll really enjoy her blog!
I’m also over at my friend Allison’s place Mama Wants This answering all kinds of questions for her Guest Star post! Thank you Allison for asking me, it’s an honor!
Also…who is on your Free Pass list?My Free Pass List post was such a hit that people wanted a linky for it! Write about your Free Pass List and come link up this week!