Mommy Moment – Jennifer Style

Welcome to another Mommy Moment! If you’re not sure what it is, head over and read all about how Mommy Moments at the Monster came to be. Today, I’m so excited to welcome Jennifer from Midwest “Mom”ments!

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Jennifer is a mom of 2 little girls, a wife, and as you’ll hear shortly, a soon to be working mama. She has been a friend and so supportive of me for so long that I couldn’t wait to have her share a Mommy Moment here!

Go grab a cup of coffee and a donut, ahem, I mean a low-fat muffin, or depending on the time of the day maybe some wine and chocolate, and sit back and enjoy the story!

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I Know I Should Be Excited

So, when I got this email from Natalie asking if I would be interested in sharing a Mommy Moment, I thought to myself, “Surely she meant to send this to someone else? Not little ol’ me?” What an honor! I’m so excited to be here today in the same spot that has been home to so many of my bloggy idols. I hope you enjoy this post about how our kids can turn the tables on us.

I know I should be excited. It’s a great opportunity.

But I’m not.

I know I should be thankful.

I am.

But mostly?

I’m sad. The tears started falling on my walk to the parking lot after the final interview. I nailed it, and I knew it. I should have been proud. I was almost positive they were going to offer me the job.

And they did.

In a market where people have been out of work for years, I was able to find a new job within a couple of months. It was a huge relief to my husband who also was able to find a new position, but only as a contract worker through December.

But I had become spoiled. I got to realize my stay-at-home-mom dream, if only for a few weeks. And now I don’t want to give it up.

“You got to be with them for two-and-a-half months,” my husband said when I started crying about leaving the girls.

“I know,” I sniffled.

“And before that, you got to be with them half the time for the five months your hours were cut at your last job.”

“I know.”

“And you wanted to strangle them almost every day.”

“I know.”

Doesn’t mean I didn’t love every minute of it. And since I got the news, I’ve been trying to figure out how to break it to my babies. I envision dramatic drop-offs at daycare where they cling to me desperately, crying their little eyes out. I finally mentioned it to S as casually as possible while we were in the van running errands Saturday.

“Honey, remember that interview I went to?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I got the job,” I said, brightly. “So you and Sissy will be going back to daycare.” My chest tightened, preparing for her reaction. She didn’t say anything.

“I’ll miss seeing you all day which makes me feel a little sad,” I said, trying to create a safe place for her to share her emotions. “It’s ok if you feel sad, too.”

“Oh, it’ll be fine, Mom,” she said, in her wise four-year-old voice. “I’ll still see you at suppertime and bedtime.”

Ok, then.

Apparently it will just be me crying and clinging at drop-off. (Which is a good thing.)

Jennifer Barr is a wife and (soon-to-be) working mom of two beautiful girls who keep her on her toes! Most of those experiences are chronicled on her blog, Midwest “Mom”ments.

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Seriously, I got goosebumps reading this! Kids are so wise sometimes, and always when we really, really hope they’ll be. This made me cry, especially since I’ve been trying to decide about working full time or staying home and working part time. It seems like it would be great to get away from them and talk to adults all day long, but like Jennifer – even though we want to strangle them – it’s hard to walk away from the luxury and luck of being able to stay home.

There’s no manual out there for what we do, so sharing stories like this helps us all learn from each other. Now head over to Midwest “Mom”ments and say hello to Jennifer. If you are a Twitter addict, you can find @MidwestMomments there, and on facebook, too! And if you are a new follower, make sure to tell her that I sent you!

Comments

  1. This made me tear up a little. I remember that feeling the first time I had to leave my girl after maternity leave.

    And it’s such a hard choice to make. Also, I think kids know too much. Half the time I fret about leaving my little one (at church for example) and she has no qualms about it. Um, why am I almost crying instead of rolling my eyes as a child clings to my leg?

    Sending you mami hugs because this is the struggle of the modern day mami. I’ll be checking out your blog to keep up with you and make sure I drop off a hug here and there as needed ;-).
    Sili recently posted..Mami Reads: I’m a Scary Mommy. How About You?My Profile

  2. Thanks, Nat, for hosting me! So excited to be here!
    NotJustAnotherJennifer recently posted..Guest Post at Mommy of a Monster!My Profile

  3. Aw. :( Good luck with your new job, Jenn! Your girls will be fine, and maybe it won’t be forever. Right? I understand how you feel, though. That would make me really sad, too. Hugs!

  4. Congratulations on your new job Jennifer. Prayers for you and your family during this transition. :)
    Cindi recently posted..Remembering When: Easter SundayMy Profile

  5. Well, of course congratulations on your new job and on raising such a wise little girl. Hugs for you for having to leave them, though :(
    angela recently posted..UncoordinatedMy Profile

  6. Congrats on the job! I understand not wanting to leave your kids. I recently returned to work after maternity leave. It is so hard to leave. Good luck and take care!
    Erin recently posted..Spring Break ReviewMy Profile