It Makes Me Mad…

Do you know what makes me mad? What really gets under my skin? Grates on my nerves? Makes me want to pull my hair out? That I can’t put together a simple poem.

I know poems don’t always have to rhyme, but in my head they always do…it’s like frickin’ Dr. Seuss lives in there or something.

I don’t remember from college writing classes all of the rules that make a poem a poem. And that makes me mad, too. For Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop, which I participate in every Thursday, the prompt that drew me in this week was to write a poem about the last thing that made me mad. Well, the last thing that made me mad was that I couldn’t write a damn poem!

Since I don’t have a poem about not being able to write a poem, I’ll tell you about the thing that made me mad before that. The aches and pains that come when you are having a particularly rough bout of depression. My neck and head are killing me, and I swear, if I could rip them off right now I would do it in a heartbeat. Nothing is helping. Not Aleve, not massage, not heat, not even wine! Nothing…other than muscle relaxers that are not prescribed to me that I may or may not have taken a few times over the last couple of weeks.

So, here is my attempt at a poem about pain. I don’t even know if it technically qualifies as a poem, so humor me here people!

It slams into me with force and anger.
It won’t go.
It makes me beg and plead,
but shows no mercy.
I cry. I pray for it to go.
It still won’t go.
It knows that I would do anything for a small reprieve,
for a few minutes alone.

I try to seduce it; to tease it,
with things that will make it want more.
It sleeps for a bit, then wakes.
It smiles and laughs,
and slams into me again.
And so it goes…

Mama's Losin' It
I wrote this post for Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop in response to Prompt #2: Write a poem about the last thing that made you mad.

Comments

  1. Aw, I just want to give you a big hug and buy you a massage! I hope you feel better soon girl...how long before the antid's start to kick in?

    I did get a chuckle that you had to write a poema about something that made you mad...and you were mad you couldn't write a poem. :)
  2. First, I just want you to know that I am thinking of you. I'm sending you positive energy (well, as much as I can through this computer screen) and I'm hoping that each day gets a little brighter for you. And secondly, Holy Cow!! I CAN'T WRITE A POEM, either! I swear, if my life depended on it I would be in some serious s*** because all I've got is the old "Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Sugar is sweet, and so are You" mess that is stuck on my brain with super glue. I mean, I've got NOTHIN'!!! So, you are not alone.

    p.s. I like your poem.
  3. Bethany @ Organic Enchilada says:
    Lovely work - it must have been therapeutic in some way?!

    I get migraines fairly frequently, so I know how it goes. Sorta. Hope you get relief soon.
  4. I'm so glad I happened on to your blog. This post describes EXACTLY how I feel today. I can't write poetry and I have a huge headache with accompanying neck pain from a little bought of sadness I'm going through this week. And I also have a monster of a toddler that I truly love, but let's face it, he's a monster. But I don't have twins. Whew, it was getting kind of freaky there for a sec. Ha! Anyways, you have a new follower!!
  5. This definitely qualifies as a poem. I think it describes depression perfectly. It's amazing how much physical pain depression causes, isn't it? My neck and shoulders ALWAYS hurt. Hope you're able to find some pain relief. : )
  6. Sorry girl. Wish I could take it from ya. I actually like your poem. I'm so not a lit major though and know none of the rules or anything. It expresses how you feel and flows well. Isn't that all ya need? Ok, I should stop before I reveal too much here. Hang in there. HUGS!
  7. Allyson & Jere says:
    If it makes you feel any better AT ALL, I am the mayor of sucktown when it comes to poems. I just don't GET IT! I can't even write cheesy rhyme, much less A POEM. So, there, you can have that.

    As it turns out though..I actually like your "poem", if it's a poem, but I wouldn't know because I don't get poems. I thought it was rather good. But again, that would be like me judging one of the dancers on SYTYCD, letting them know that from my fat arsed perspective, they did that portabluh WRONG! Anyway, you totally get the idea.

    In other news....I had no idea that the aches and pains and unrelenting shoulder, neck, head pain could come from depression. This is so enlightning. Like, holy crap, maybe I's suffers from some bouts o' depression now and again enlightening.

    And with that said, this now being the worlds longest comment. I bid thee adiou. And say, hang in friend. And perhaps...write another poem, this time, make it rhyme!

    HA! I AM a poet, and I didn't even know it!
  8. The Urban Cowboy says:
    I liked it! But than again, what do I know?
  9. Pumpkin and Piglet says:
    Not everyone understands that depression can also cause physical pain, hang in there. Can you talk to your doctor about a prescription? I think what you've written qualifies as a poem, so you CAN write one :)
  10. That is an awesome poem!! Nicely done! I hoped it helped you somehow
  11. Belle's Butterfly says:
    I'm sorry that you are going through this. I can't even imagine what it is like. I really hope that it starts to get better soon.

    And don't feel bad, I couldn't write a poem if my life depended on it. Every week I skip over that prompt. I don't even think about it!
  12. Definitely a poem- and a heartfelt one at that!
  13. Courtney says:
    Girl, I can't write a poem to save my life. Thinking about you, Natalie and praying for complete healing and peace. Hang in there!
  14. I'm the same way about needing to rhyme a poem. For some reason, I find it so much easier to write one if it rhymes. I think some people are just rhymers. I hope you feel better soon. Chin up!
  15. NanaDiana says:
    Isn't it sad,
    That when you are mad,
    You can't find a way to say it?

    If I were you,
    I'd be feeling quite blue,
    I think I would just want to spit!

    I can make a rhyme,
    Every single time,
    It's as easy for me as pie.

    But ask me to say,
    How I got this way,
    And all you will get is a lie.

    (Not really-but it rhymed;>)
  16. Funky Mama Bird says:
    Sorry the pain is making you mad. I did have to smile at the being mad about not being able to write a poem about being mad.
  17. Natalie, this is fantastic. I'm tempted to print it and hang it.
  18. Paul and Kerry says:
    you are so funny! I thought your poem was great! I'm not really into poetry but it sounded good to me. I am so sorry you hurt! hopefully reinforcements are coming over to help you with kiddos and you can take something "strong".
  19. Aging Mommy says:
    Well perhaps being mad about not being able to write a poem made you mad enough to write a good one about being mad - if that makes sense :-) There are people who can write the most magical poetry with effortless ease. But the very best of poetry in my view is that which is written from the heart as if so then the feelings and intent clearly shine through, as do yours here. So well done. I wish I could come over and help you out for a day and give my daughter some much needed play mates at the same time :-)
  20. I suppose in the grand scale scheme of things there are worse things out there. I say start with haikus (they're short) and branch out from there.
  21. Megan (Best of Fates) says:
    That's a great poem! I mean - depressing and causing sympathy pain in my neck, but well written!
  22. Sluiter Nation says:
    I totally just signed up for the mama kat writer's workshop too and of course I tried for three damn days to write a mad poem and threw in the towel and decided I would start next week! Ha! Your poem is great! it makes me want to give you hugs though!

    Also? you "and so it goes..." totally reminds me of Slaughter House Five...whenever he mentioned death. A little morbid, I know, but I keep forgetting to tell you that.
  23. Sharlene T. says:
    As a singer, my poems have to rhyme:
    Roses are reddish; violets are bluish.
    If there was no Christmas, we'd all be Jewish!

    Not great but I gotta be able to play along with my guitar... your poem is so much more on a higher plane and very good... what don't you like? I'm sorry, but you can write poems...

    Twitter: SolarChief
  24. I'm sorry you're in the throes of a bad, bad time. Poetry doesn't have to rhyme - expressing emotion the way you did? Fab!
  25. That's a poem! No need to channel Maya Angelou or anything. :)
  26. Sounds like a pretty good poem to me! Hope the pain goes away soon friend!
  27. Maureen says:
    That's an honest poem - that's how I see it and it's great. Hope you will feel better soon, girl. Hang in there, Mama! Hugs!
  28. That is a great poem! I am still trying to figure out what the heck I am going to write!
  29. Carrie K says:
    Thank you
  30. {HUGS} I'm so sorry you have to go through rough times like that. I like your poem-it's heartfelt and that's what makes poems the best. :)
  31. Writing poems allude me most of the time too. I'm impressed with what you came up with!
  32. The Empress says:
    I think that was PERFECT.
    As in, really good.
  33. Sue Campbell says:
    (Rotten)Haiku for Natalie:

    You need a massage
    To fight all this summer pain
    Sunshine has no hands.
  34. Sounds like a poem to me. Come to Jersey. I'll give you a massage.
  35. blueviolet says:
    I can truly sense your anger there and I feel that way when mine flares up!
  36. Natalie, I feel for you, and am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers these days. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time.

    If it makes you feel any better, your poem is actually pretty good! Much better than the rhyming piece of junk I posted.

    Consider yourself virtually hugged, ok?
  37. PV Lundqvist says:
    I think the very fact that the word 'poem' has no rhyme says it all really.
  38. TIGHTWAD says:
    Hey! I nominated you for an award! Come visit!
  39. CoffeeJitters (Judy Haley) says:
    ah, I can relate. great poem.
  40. MommaKiss says:
    well, no matter what you 'call it' a poem should be your own words, that flow from your pen (or fingers).
    not to mention, i truly feel your pain. especially the 'may or may not' have taken something not specifically prescribed to me ;)
    work is now blocking blogs. most likely for the best - but know i'm reading in reader, even if i don't make it over here.
  41. I liked your poem because I actually understood it. Alot of times I'll read a poem and be left with a big fat "huh?" :)

    I get migraines that incapcitate me so I understand the headache thing. I joke about being a pill popper, but when it gets bad sometimes I get fetal and sit in a corner and rock back and forth. GO TO THE DOCTOR, a good one can help more than self medicating. Save the good stuff for recreational purposes :)
  42. ♥Cari♥ says:
    This is an excellent poem!! You did a great job! No reason to be mad whatsoever :) HUGS!!
  43. I think you did an excellent job with that poem Natalie! And yes. I am fighting with my depression right now too. We are trying a different medication... I'm on day 3. We shall see.... HUGS to you!
  44. Your poem was lovely.

    You need to be more aware of your own abilities.

    Or were you just looking for all of us to leap to your defense and tell you how fabulous your poem was?

    If that's the case? You are all devious and sneaky.

    In a poetic sort of way.

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  1. [...] buddy (or girlfriend) that follows him around. A quick update…remember that I told you about my battle with depression? So many of you have sent me emails asking how I’m doing…thank you so much for your [...]