Introducing My New Feature: The Bidness

Have I ever told you that the twins have a groupie? I know, you think I’m just trying to be funny, but I’m absolutely serious. And this is no ordinary groupie…this is the ultimate groupie, and you all know who she is!

Any guesses?

Okay, I’ll give you a hint:

That’s right! The Empress from Good Day, Regular People! The Empress fell in love with the girls long ago – but her absolute favorite thing about them is when they do naughty things that make me want to pull my hair out…I think she really thinks they’re still cute.

Because she loves those little monsters/tyrants/sweethearts so much, I asked her to tell you about the newest Mommy of a Monster feature.

So without further adieu, I gave you the Empress, who is going to introduce The Bidness…my, ahem, I mean the girls’ new feature!

————–

Her eyelashes slowly flutter open as she is awakened by the bright chirping of the birds that have made their home in the tree just outside of her sheer draped french windows.

She smiles as she rolls over onto her side, and sees her husband, still asleep and still handsome after ten years of an idyllic marriage.

Yawning, she grins at the thought of what her day holds ahead: an early Pilates class with her best and dearest friends, followed by a massage at the club’s spa. Without a doubt, the morning will be celebrated with mimosas and the fresh fruit filled crepes their club is known for.

::RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP::

“MOMMY!! Please wake up! OPEN THE DOOR!”

:POUND POUND POUND:

“Mommy! HELP! The twins are dumping out ALL the flour and pulling out the mixer because they say they want pancakes. MOMMY! PLEASE! OPEN THIS DOOR! HURRY!”

:POUND POUND POUND:

Silent swears fill her head as she realizes–once again–it had all been a dream. A dream. Even the handsome husband whose head had been on the pillow next to hers–that lucky dog was already at work. He called it work. HA! THAT made her laugh out loud.

No longer able to deny reality, she threw back the covers, revealing the T shirt and yoga pants she had passed out in the night before. When had she last been able to simply go to bed, she wondered, why was it always passing out like she had just been hit in the head with a 2×4.

She caught herself as she almost tripped down the stairs in her haste to get to the kitchen as quickly as physics allowed. She had learned long ago that seconds counted in staving off clean up time where the twins were involved. Visions, and not holy ones, filled her head, of what she might find once she turned the corner after that last bottom step.

No matter how far she reached into her mind, the twins always did one better.

And this morning’s early sight was no exception.

Welcome to a day in the life with Ms.L and Ms. M. And poor Tater, who will grow up to pen such a memoir, mark my words.

Life with the girls. Life with the home of The Bidness.

I have been asking and begging and harassing and driving Natalie nuts to PLEASE have a weekly feature of what these girls are up to. I get a huge kick out of them. I think it’s the safety in numbers, it’s the twin double trouble, it’s the hilarity of watching it happen to someone else, it’s the joy and the moments of hijinks that I love. “I’ll take a picture, a snippet, a captioned photo, a short story…anything…. ” I told her, “I just have to get my girls on a regular basis.”

Natalie is making my bloggy dreams come true: with the debut of a weekly dose of The Bidness.

I am so dang happy.

Welcome to your own regular feature, Ms.L and Ms. M. You have made this old bag very, very happy. It’s always so much fun to laugh, and watch, because it’s happening to someone else. Seriously, you girls make my day.

Happy to have you here!

And, Nat? I can laugh because it’s happening to you and not me.

————-

Sigh. I’m glad that you get such a kick out of them, Empress!

The girls will be posting for the first time next Friday. They’re already very excited about it. The Empress already has a question she wants the girls to answer: “How do you decide what to do that will make their mom lose her mind that day?”

They’ll be answering that question, as well as any questions you might want to ask them! If you have a question for Lila or Mia, leave it in the comment below!

In the meantime, make sure that you visit The Empress at Good Day Regular People.

And Empress? Thank you. I owe you one!

Comments

  1. What a great idea! Lila & Mia, who is usually the instigator of these troubles your Mommy writes about and The Empress so enjoys watching from the sidelines?
  2. thank you so much for introducing me to this blog I love her!
  3. The Empress did an excellent job introducing this series. Twins...what should the Empress change her nickname to (if she was ever going to change it)?
  4. Oh, this is going to be so much fun...for us, the readers!!
  5. YES!! They give me a reason to get up, even on this overcast day. I love my girls!!
  6. So. Much. Fun!
  7. Isn't it great to know when you are ready to take that second honeymoon, you can leave your cherubs in capable hands ... and I believe that at least a month is the required second honeymoon period ... fo' sho!!!
  8. Oh I'm so excited and something for ME to relate to, my boys are TOO FUNNY lately. :) Girls, what are your favorite toys right now? How do you decide? :)
  9. Now she is virtually adopting other bloggers' offspring. Do the depths of this woman's goodness never end? Wonderful post.
  10. There seriously is something about trouble in numbers. Two kids the same age kind find something to destroy every minute of the day. I can't wait to here what your girls are up to so I feel better about my own wild duo.
  11. I have an affinity for twin toddlers, one of my friends has two little girls who amaze me with their deviousness. Last week they figured out how to stack a chair onthe dining room table so one of the girls could hang onto the fan blade for a "ride". Did I mention they're 2 and can hardly talk?? I'll look forward to this blog ;)
  12. Bahaha - I get that SOOO much from friends and family members: "It's funny because it's you, not me" Yeeeah, thanks. LOL
  13. The Empress is a wonderful ally to have. I wonder how she got away from the royal wedding to visit you here. Omnipotence has its advantages, I suppose.
  14. Do you know how to get an intro or WHAT? Nice job, Oh Wise Empress! I want to know if the girls have ever done anything like Sober Julie's friends up there. Hysterical!!!
  15. Oh Yes! I am looking forward to these posts! I have no multiples neither does my BFF but when our gang gets together we affectionately and publicly call them, Hey! Brat Pack!
  16. What a way to kick off a series! I loved the sound effect of the needle scratching the record player. Ah, but it sounded like a wonderful dream. Sounds like it will be a fun feature. And I will laugh because it’s happening to you and not me.
  17. Great intro to a new series! Can't wait!
  18. LOVE THIS! looking forward to coming every friday to read. I guess the only upside to one of my twin boys having autism: they really couldn't gang up together to destroy me.
  19. What an awesome idea. I can't wait for next week.
  20. This is going to be so much fun to read! Great idea.
  21. haha. nice. empress sent me..and i look forward to next friday as baby e's posts are some of my favs of the week...
  22. LOVE! Can't wait to see it.
  23. Great idea! Can't get enough of The Bidness! Hey girls...how much would you looooove to spend a week with your Auntie Empress so she can experience your hijinks firsthand? ;)
  24. Hilarious. The girls are super stars before the age of...what? Two? The Empress knows how to bestow her fairy blogmotherness on everyone.
  25. Oh this is so fun. Loved the introduction. xo
  26. Can't wait to read the first edition!
  27. I love it! What a fabulous idea!
  28. This is a great feature!! Love the intro by The Empress!! The girls must be excited to be appearing on their own posts. What are their visions for this feature?
  29. I would like to ask the girls their thoughts and steps to achieving world domination as they seem well on their way.
  30. Oh, I love this idea!!! Why? Because it's original!!!! And who doesn't love the bidness?????
  31. This is hilarious and genius. Love
  32. Cannot wait! This should be a riot.
  33. Ohh yes it will be really a riot.

Trackbacks

  1. [...] case you missed it yesterday, I had a special guest poster who announced my new feature: The Bidness. The twins will be taking over my blog once a week, and you’ll get to ask them any questions [...]
  2. [...] The girls will be explaining why they wouldn’t cooperate…and by ‘girls’ I mean Mia…on Friday, so make sure you come to read the first post for The Bidness! [...]
  3. [...] – Tomorrow will be Lila and Mia’s first ‘The Bidness’ post, so make sure to drop by! 0 Comments - Leave a comment! « Previous [...]
  4. [...] guys like when I give The Business. She said that her friend The Empress liked it so much that she wanted us to talk to you. So here we are. This is [...]
  5. [...] Smart Mom Picks and Smart Mom Style. She has regular features on her blog including the hilarious The Bidness, featuring twins Lila and Mia; Mommy Monster Moments, where moms are invited to share their mommy [...]
  6. [...] it. That’s when The Empress from Good Day, Regular People had the idea that I should host a feature called The Bidness. That’s not exactly true…she wanted Lila & Mia to host The Bidness! Every week, [...]