I’m Hoping For an Ally in Alli

Photo of Boats on the Sandbar, Lake Havasu, Arizona

Holy Crap Batman! I just realized I have one month and one day to get into good enough shape to fit myself into a bathing suit! This, my friends, is NOT good news!

You may remember about a month ago, I wrote a post about my need to lose weight, but my 100% lack of willpower. Since then, I have not done a damn thing to (a) lose weight or (b) get my arse moving through any source of exercise. I am in no shape to put on a bikini, that is for sure. And I’m freaking out…big time.

We are supposed to be going to Lake Havasu (actually Parker, but I thought more people would’ve heard of Lake Havasu as opposed to Parker) in mid June. We are going with my sister and her hubby. Oh, and all of the kids. I LOVE going to Havasu and the Colorado River. It is a lot of fun. Late morning, we jump in the boat, and hang out all day drinking beer. Then at night, we pull the boat out of the water, bbq, and drink more beer. Lots of good times at the river. Before kids, I mean.

Have you ever watched Party Heat: Lake Havasu, a TV show? I don’t remember the channel, and I don’t even know if it’s still on. Basically, it was a reality show about cops dealing with all the hoodlums and drunkards on the lake on any given weekend. They showed the Sandbar a lot; a place where everybody pulls up to the sandbar, anchors their boats and parties. Hundreds of people and boats. It’s crazy. And yes, that show was a pretty real depiction of the craziness that goes on there. I was going to list all of the things that I may or may not have done while at Lake Havasu, before kids. But hubby put his foot down and said no. He did not want me talking about flashing, beer bongs, or any totally inappropriate things that mommies should not do. Lots of craziness, I’ll leave it at that.

This trip will be much, much different. We are going in the middle of the week instead of the weekend. It will probably be pretty dead. No craziness with the kids there. I’m still looking forward to the trip and all the fun that we’ll have with the kids! We’ll let my nieces wakeboard and pull them behind the boat on the intertube. Tater loves the boat and can’t wait to go on it and “drive it with Daddy”. We took Tater when he was about the same age as the twins, and he had a blast. I’m hoping things go smoothly

So…today I start taking Alli! I’m hoping to lose 10 lbs. in one month via Alli. I’m being very optimistic. I don’t think I even need to tell you what Alli is or what happens to you if you take it and eat too much fat. Let’s just say Alli + too much fat intake = oily discharge from your bum. Not a pretty thing, but supposedly very effective!

I’ll keep you posted on my progress. But I’m not talking about oily discharge. I’m sure you don’t want to hear about it, and I don’t want to talk about it!

On a happier note, If SHE Can Figure It Out… gave me the Versatile Blogger award! I wanted to thank her because I looove getting awards and I appreciate her thinking of me! Go over and check out her post  Whose Toes Are Those? that she wrote for Mama Kat’s Writing Workshop last week. It’s one of my favorite posts ever! If you still wanna know seven random things about me, well then….click here!

And so it goes…


  1. Good luck with the weight loss! I'm in the same boat!
  2. Good luck! I've heard of Alli but don't know anyone who has used it so I'll be interested to see how you get on!
  3. NanaDiana says:
    Sorry-I had the previous one worded wrong..here it is in its corrected state...
    Good Luck! You CAN do it...and even if you can't they wlll love you with a few extra pounds just as much as they love you right now. And....someday you may look back at your "now" pictures and think...Boy! I was perfect back then! lol ps...see you have connected with MY baby girl...you two have the same sassy sense of humor;>)
  4. Complicated Mama says:
    This is SO funny bc I had NO idea Lake Havasu was such a party place and maybe 5 posts back mentioned how a bunch of my old high school friends (all 30yrs+) rented a yacht and "partied it up Jersey Shore Style"

    ... seriously. The article written about them would be funny if it werent so sad.

    Let me know how Alli works- I've thought about it but never tried it.
  5. Funky Mama Bird says:
    My dad uses Alli from time to time. He swears he's never had a, um, problem, but he also doesn't eat a super fat heavy diet. He likes to use it as a preventative; I took that pill so now I can't eat too much fat for fear of consequences!
  6. If SHE can figure it out.......... says:
    Hey!!! Thanks for the shout out! I'm afraid of Alli - I don't know if you remember when WOW! potato chips came out, but they were test-marketed in our area and they were supposed to taste just like real chips except they were fat-free.....They WERE delicious, but they had some major consequences. i.e. oily pants explosions. Therefore, i am afraid of Alli and any other product that warns of "oily discharge". :)
  7. Rebecca Watson says:
    i love ther saying by roseanne bar on your blog! totally cute!
  8. Good luck on your Alli journey. And good luck on that oily discharge. Lol. The good news is, there are plenty of really great full coverage swimsuits these days and great board shorts to boot.
  9. I keep laughing at the thought of oily discharge! HAHAHAHAHA!
  10. Courtney says:
    Oily discharge, eh? {giggle} Seriously, though - GOOD LUCK! I know where you are. I just got back from vacation and I gagged every time I put on a bathing suit.
  11. Man, I'm glad you warned me. I always thought Lake Havasu was peaceful and that oily discharge was my friend. Glad this post cleared up both those notions!
  12. How about switch things about and take a trip to the Gulf Coast and you would fit right in with a little oily discharge.
  13. Hope it works. I'm dieting the old fashioned way... cake & ice cream.
  14. I have always wanted to go to lake havasu...seems like such a awesome place to go! Good luck on alli...I have not had many clients try that but I have seen results from different studies on it. Good Luck girl!
  15. I'm thankful that you are not going to talk about the oily discharge!! But wait..you already did! ha ha

    Good luck to you, my friend!
  16. Mrs.Mayhem says:
    Good luck with the weight loss. I've given up on a bikini, and just keep looking for bathing suits with more and more coverage.
  17. Krysten @ After 'I Do' says:
    Ugh dieting. One day I'll try that... or not?
  18. Keep us posted on how Alli works. I have a friend who tried it for a few months before her brother's wedding, with FANTASTIC results. She said the oily stuff only happened right after she ate, but she was being pretty careful to avoid anything high in fat. Part of me wonders how much of that drug is intended to psychological. I'm sooooo tempted to try it. Don't know how it would interact with my wonky thyroid and other medical issues, though, and I'm pretty sure my doc would not like the idea. Anyway, let us know!

    BTW, have you been over to the Mommyologist (http://www.mommyologist.com/) to discover your Mom Sexy? Curves are good! Wear that bikini! With attitude!!
  19. The Mommyologist says:
    Found you from On The Rocks and Straight Up and I agree with her!! Wear that bikini with pride girl! It's great if you lose the 10 pounds, but if you don't...no worries! Just enjoy your vacation and don't put too much pressure on yourself. Remember you're MOM SEXY!!!
  20. Heather Binkley says:
    I came by from SITS and love your blog. I'm following now and was wondering if you wanted to swap buttons or something. Great post! Funny, honest - everything I love in a friend and a blog.
  21. WhisperingWriter says:
    Yeah, I really need to lose some weight.

    I just like food too much.
  22. LazyCrazyMama says:
    The vacation sounds like so much fun!! Good luck with the weight loss! I was able to lose tons of weight just by cutting out as much sugar as possible from my diet (amazingly hard!) and eating a lot of dairy (yogurt, cottage cheese...)
  23. Barely Domestic Mama says:
    Good grief that is a lot of a boats! I thought those were bugs at first.

    Good luck with your weight loss! I've heard about the unfortunate side effects about Alli from my hubby since his co-workers were having this discussion. I didn't even want to ask how this came up.
  24. Allyson & Jere says:
    If ONLY it was 10 lbs. for me to lose. That'd be swell. But, good luck to you and your quest.
  25. Lula Lola says:
    So funny! That's a sexy post, you went from flashing to oily discharge in about a paragraph! I need some that Alli myself! I'm an actual sow!
  26. Arizona Mamma says:
    Gross. Just gross.

    But, you will have to let me know how it works for you. I have ten that are hanging on like nobody's business, and I am so tired of it.
  27. Angelia Sims says:
    10lbs and you add a little more slick to the gulf. That's nothing! :-D

    Hope you have a GREAT trip. I am 100% empty on will power as well and I have a wedding in Oct. I think I might be the runaway bride but it may be more like the roll away bride. Heh!
  28. Hav-a-brew with kids!? Wow, that certainly sounds like a different sort of family vacation. That uh, sandbar can get pretty gnarly from what (little) I remember. ;) Good luck!

    Also, good luck with the oily discharge, I mean diet. But, if I know you, you are as probably as fit and trim as ever and are just being silly about needing to lose weight.
  29. sarabrenner says:
    Alli is a horrible product. I only lost a small amount of weight, and even then, the stomach discomfort was not even close to worth it. There are much better alternatives out there. I switched over to the Lady Soma Detox and started dropping weight like crazy..and my stomach feels much better. Alli is a joke.


  1. [...] I have to do something about it. Alli is NOT something I want to try again. So I have decided to just eat right…not diet [...]
  2. [...] if you remember our trip to Parker last year, then you remember our jaunt through [...]
  3. [...] might add) that I need to lose those 15 lbs. of baby weight I’m still lugging around. I tried Alli, but the side effects were well, let’s just say kind of gross. I tried the Fat Belly Diet, [...]
  4. […] it’s because I’m on vacation! I mentioned this trip a month ago when I was determined to lose 10 pounds before going on vacation, which I failed miserably at due to my lack of […]