The Dreaded Bikini Wax

I’m on vacation people! If you don’t see me around your blog, and if I don’t respond to a comment, it’s because I’m on vacation!
I mentioned this trip a month ago when I was determined to lose 10 pounds before going on vacation, which I failed miserably at due to my lack of willpower. I’m sure we are having fun, and I’m sure it is hot at the lake, and I promise to catch back up with you at the end of the week!!

So to keep you entertained while I’m away, I present to you one of my best blogging friends, Liz! If you don’t already know Liz, you will love her. So once you are done reading here, go check out her out at her pad – she has 2 beautiful little girls, she cooks like she belongs on the Food Network, and grows a garden that makes me jealous! Enjoy!

When Duty Calls

Hi Guys! I’m Liz and I blog at a belle, a bean & a chicago dog. Natalie is one of my very best bloggy friends, and someone who is part of my bloggy tribe.

Natalie recently put out a call for guest writing help, and like any good tribesman, when duty calls, you answer.

We women have many calls for duty, if you ask me. It could be a leaky-explosive-diarrhea-diaper call, a mommy-I-found-my-3-day-old-milk-cup-under-the-sofa call, or even a I-can’t-find-something-in-the-fridge-because-I’m-not-really-looking-for-it husband call.

And then there are the personal calls.

The keeping-things-kempt type calls.

The I’m-getting-ready-for-vaca-and-will-be-wearing-a-swimsuit-everyday calls.

Can you guess where this is headed?

Before our family vacation in April, I decided to get my very first bikini wax.

I’m 32 years old, and this was the first time I’ve had any type of waxing done.

I called my best friend, Kat, for advice. She’s the type of friend that you can ask, without hesitation, questions like, “How long do you let your hair grow before your waxing appointment?”, and not think twice. She went for her first waxing a few years back, before a family beach vacation of her own. I wanted to know what to expect when I got there, and knew she was the girl to tell me.

I called and made my appointment. And for whatever reason, I was caught off-guard when there was a male voice on the other end of the phone.

Do I really need to talk to a GUY about setting up an appointment to yank the hair out of my nether regions? And then to have him ask me, “Will this be a regular bikini wax, or a Brazilian?”

I guess I’m too old school, but I think a dude working the front desk at a salon just.isn’t.right.

Anyway, the day of my appointment came, and I was able to check in at the front desk without talking to a man {phew!}. A woman came to get me and guided me back through their labyrinth of hallways. She sat me down and handed me forms of the legal variety that I needed to sign before the torture waxing could begin.

Then she took me into a room with a table, mood music and soft lighting, handed me something that looked like a tampon, and instructed me to put it on, and cover up with a hand towel she had left for me on the table.

She left the room and I undressed from the waist down. I opened the tampon-ish package and out came what could only be described as a paper thong.

Hmmm…interesting.

While sporting my paper thong, I hopped onto the table, covered a whopping 8.25 inches of myself with the hand towel, and laid back, waiting for her to return.

The polite knock came shortly after, and my waxing was underway.

Silly me thought saying “a regular bikini wax” was information enough, but I quickly learned that I needed to show her how far *in* I wanted her to go, and if I wanted any “off the top”.

I’m not going to lie; the waxing hurt. But the pain vanished within a couple seconds of each yank.

I would say the whole appointment lasted 15 minutes, tops. It ended with her (mostly) wiping up the sticky spots of wax left on my skin, and applying some Finipil.

She left the room and I got dressed, making sure to deposit my paper thong in the trash.

Because Kat told me to, I wore loose fitting pants that day.

Kat is one wise woman.

Her suggestion was a good one.

Raw skin = discomfort when clothes rub.

Plus, I didn’t want to look like I just got off a horse walking out of the salon.

All in all, it was a good experience, and the benefits outweigh any downside.
 
I’d do it again in a heartbeat, and recommend it to any other bikini wax virgins out there.
 
And so it goes…

Comments

  1. Pumpkin and Piglet says:
    I've only ever waxed once. It was a home wax and it hurt. A lot! I'm afraid it really put me off but maybe a salon one wouldn't be so bad?!? I think I would have been a bit disturbed at a guy answering the phone too, it's a bit unsettling!
  2. Meggles says:
    I tried once and it was waaaay too painful for me. And I have a piercing there. Maybe I just went to a bad girl.
  3. Katie's Dailies says:
    Thinkin' that eyebrow waxing is pain enough for me, but you are a brave woman nevertheless!
  4. Funky Mama Bird says:
    Since I swim every week, I can't let my, um, hair grow long enough to wax. I've always wanted to, though.
  5. Christine says:
    I was thinking about getting one before my C-section, but I'm really scared...thanks for sharing your experience!
  6. I will admit I am a bikini waxing virgin. The whole thing makes me kind of nervous. But it doesn't sound like your experience was horrible.
  7. MandyE (Twin Trials and Triumphs) says:
    I started getting bikini waxes in college, when I lived at an apartment with a pool. I only "treat" myself now when we're going on vacation and I'll be wearing a swimsuit. It's not exactly "fun", but I agree the benefits far outweigh the pain...and the embarrassment of a paper thong. :)
  8. Girl, no way! I'm 39 and have yet to have a bikini wax...the eybrows hurt bad enough. I will shave that region within an inch of its life but keep that hot wax away from there!
  9. Sippy Cup Mom says:
    I have never done one and I'm terrified!

    My brows hurt me!
  10. I'm with you, no men at the salon. Which seems odd when you consider that my OB is male.

    But, when I go to the OB, I'm not looking to relax. Maybe that's the issue?
  11. Bethany @ Organic Enchilada says:
    At least it wasn't a man doing the waxing, eh? Any off the top? I think that image will be with me all day - making me smile!
  12. ModernMom says:
    Put me in the bikini wax virgin category! I've thought about it but am just too chicken!
  13. Maureen says:
    Oh you are one brave brave gal, Liz! I have never try this but thanks for the loose fitting tips! Oh and yeah I'd be a bit embarassed to make the appointment with a guy.
  14. I get my brows done regularly and I'm now immune to it, but I have only had three bikini waxes in my life and I am still traumatized! I don't know why I keep going back. Holy Painful!!! For me, it is right up there with breast feeding.

    Great post!!
  15. forty-something chick says:
    What, the guy on the phone didn't offer some special topiary shape, like a star or a heart?? I have only gone for this a few times, always when getting ready for a vacation that has a swimsuit involved. The last time I had one, I reacted badly and had big RED bumps for days afterwards. Not pretty, but not hairy either!

    Great guest post!
  16. The Urban Cowboy says:
    Dang, can I get one of those things?
  17. Mama Hen says:
    Have a great vacation! Painful! Yikes!
    Mama Hen
  18. Aging Mommy says:
    If I get an eyebrow wax my skin burns, so I don't think even if I was brave enough to contemplate it that getting waxed anywhere else would be a good idea :-)
  19. Oh man..I hear ya! Waxing is torture...but pain is beauty and all that jazz! Love your account!
  20. I've totally thought about doing this like a hundred times but I'm way to chicken. I just don't know if I could take it!!
  21. MommaKiss says:
    hope momma's having a good vacation!
    now this waxin bit. I've recently started. Like I've ripped my girly bits 3x now. My girlfriend does it (used to work for eliz grady). I had to grow it out first - not comfy - and the first time I had wine to dull the pain. The second time, a percocet. B/c yes, that HURTS. But for the good of the grooming, right?
    not sure i could have a man doin' it!!
  22. The first time I had waxing done I had a brazilian. Why? Because I'm just glutton for punishment. I tell you. I made not a peep during labor with both my children but I wanted to shriek in pain. I held it in partly because the lady that was waxing me looked like she once belonged to the KGB. All in all it was still worth it. The pain was momentary and the waxing lasted for weeks. I tried it again when I was 8 months pregnant. Now that was even more painful. Again, still worth it.
  23. Cara Mamma says:
    Very well written and oh so true! I finally got used to the pain when I was waxed regularly--but I have not in 6 months or so--and am dreading going before my trip to Mexico. yikes! Ibuprofen helps!
  24. All I'm going to say on this one is...

    Aw, hell naw! Nobody's gonna get a peek at my nether regions except the hubs. I try to get him not to look either (doesn't work). One of my many foibles is I'm just a little too modest over here. Nobody's touching it either!

    Props to you for being brave, though. You go girl!
  25. Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip says:
    HILARIOUS STORY, Liz!! I'm glad that it wasn't too painful!! And that you enjoyed it enough to consider doing it again.

    I must admit this post speaks to me because I am extremely hairy. Or was extremely hairy anyway. When I was in my early 20's a dr in South American decided I was probably half man, due to my incredible hairiness. Anyway, when I was in my mid-twenties, I got laser hair removal. If you think waxing hurts, multiply laser by about a kabillion, and you might have a match. But the great thing is--it's permanent. So no more half-man for me. I still have a very small amount of hair that grows on my legs, but at least no one mistakes me for a man or a gorilla anymore. And that's always a plus.
  26. What's next a vajazzle? I wax my brows...I tried once to wax myself and told me waxer and she laughed so hard...and it hurt like the dickens. If and when I do it again, I will go pro!